“If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.” John 14:15
I distinctly remember the day Anthony asked me to wear contacts instead of glasses. “I like your eyes.” He said. “Glasses make them look smaller.” We were dating at the time, and I remember being offended. Didn't he like me for who I was? Glasses were a part of my identity, my 'nerd card', and almost a shield from unwanted attention. Sure, I wore contacts occasionally, when I wanted to look nice, but all the time? It has taken me six years to grips with this, that maybe doing what Anthony likes says “I love you.” I still don't wear contacts every day, but I do more frequently. And I do it because my husband likes it, and I love my husband. And I'm learning to enjoy it much more myself.
I've noticed this about myself, that I'm easily offended when asked to change. My knee jerk response tends to be, “What's the matter? Am I not good enough for you?” When it's actually just a helpful tip on how to love the one doing the asking. It seems so much easier, and less humiliating, to come up with my own ways to love, rather than take suggestions from the one I want to show love to. But this I've found to be true: Anthony does not feel loved when I bring home fresh figs and dark chocolate. But he does when I pick up Reese's peanut butter cups and vanilla ice cream. I know this because he's told me so. And the ways I've seen him change shows me love as well: I know making the bed doesn't come naturally to him, but man, does it do it for me! So now he does it every day.
I'm trying to learn to respond to my husband's requests as a call to love, not as criticism. It reminds me of the prophet Samuel's words to King Saul in 1 Samuel 15:22:
Samuel said, “Does the Lord have as much delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices As in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than a sacrifice, And to pay attention is better than the fat of rams.
Obeying the Lord (doing what He's told me He likes, what pleases Him) is better than me coming up with things to do for Him on my own. Some things He's told me He wants:
Do not worry (Matthew 6:34)
Trust the Lord (Proverbs 3:5-6)
Feed His sheep (John 21:17)
“…to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Titus 2:4-5
Rejoice always (Philippians 4:4-9)
I want to take these seriously as ways to show the Lord I love Him. I want to pour out love for Him by doing what He likes.
And a little child shall lead them…
It was Rosh Hashanah last week, and attending service with the boys was an adventure. They grow so quickly, and each season brings new wonders. Since having kids it's been impossible to pay attention to every word of the service like I used to, but I am richly repaid. They are both little sponges, and Samuel is full of questions. He almost always has something insightful to say, and it more than makes up for the parts I miss. Seeing things through the eyes of a child is to see them new, and wondrous. I'm so glad I don't have the opportunity to get stale!
Bread of the Week: Challah for the High Holy Days
Challah for the High Holy Days, from Rosh Hashanah to Sukkot, is traditionally round, with raisins or other dried fruit, and served with honey. I like cranberries and cinnamon! The round shape is a symbol of a crown, because God is the king of the universe. The added sweetness for a sweet new year. The kingship and headship of the Lord is sweet to us. “For His yoke is easy, and His burden is light.” This is my Father's world, and I'm so glad:)
Till next week,
Emily